.stray.

If your lover goes to another for satisfaction of needs it is because you are not satisfying that need. This doesn't mean you are at fault. Often those needs aren't even communicated, so how are you to be expected to satisfy them? I'm not a firm believer that one person can satisfy all the needs of another. I am a firm believer in being presented with the option to at least try though. You never know, maybe that particular need can be met by your lover if given the opportunity. At least find out if your lover wants to try before running off. However, if you're not willing to try, your lover shouldn't be expected to just stop wanting that need met. It isn't any more fair for your lover to have to give up something than it is for you.

Love isn't a possession and your lover's purpose is not to amend your dissatisfaction with yourself. It's up to you to make yourself happy. It's up to your lover to try not to take away your happy. A lover is a companion, not a replacement for your self esteem or a solution to your issues. If there is honesty, trust, understanding, there is a healthy relationship. But don't expect to be everything to your lover and don't expect your  lover to be your everything. You're only inviting heart ache if that is your expectation.

Trust your lover to make the right choices. If your lover is not an honest person, then trust that person to be who they are: dishonest, and make your own choice. It really is that simple.. if you only let it be.